Relationship break…doesn’t that sound like a breakup? Well, no — except you let it become one. Many people think asking for a relationship break is the same as breaking up. However, this is a false belief — both terms are mutually exclusive and mean different things.
A breakup means putting an end to a relationship. Meanwhile, a relationship break involves a temporary separation between you and your partner. A relationship break is usually the last resort when things between a couple have become increasingly toxic.
Taking a break allows both parties to think about their relationship issues and decide if they want to continue seeing each other. But taking isn’t a cakewalk. And if you’re not careful, it’ll end in a breakup. Want advice on how to take a break without jeopardizing your relationship? Continue reading!
Talk With Your Partner
Telling your partner that you want a break can be very difficult. However, it would help if you assured them of your love, so they are not thrown into doubt.
Explain that you need some time off from the relationship to think through things. Stress that this is a temporary phase, not a permanent one, in your relationship.
Understand why You Need a Break
A relationship break shouldn’t be your go-to tactic when you fall out with your partner. Too many temporary breaks lead to permanent breakups; asking for a break should be your last option when efforts to solve your relationship issues have failed.
A break can help you see things from a new perspective and make you understand the reasons for your partner’s behavior. It can also help you to see your flaws and how you can make compromises to solve the problems plaguing your relationship.
Discuss Specifics of the Break
Before anything, you must define what a “break” means for your relationship. Not discussing your break’s details will lead to problems down the line and may cause a final breakup.
You should specify what both parties are allowed to do during the break.
Are you allowed to see other people or, perhaps, have sex with them? Will you continue to stay in contact while the break is on? How long will the break last? Having these conversations is incredibly difficult, but they are necessary. Set ground rules, so the break is easier to manage.
Evaluate Your Relationship
This is the most important thing you should do while on a break: do an honest assessment of your relationship. This will allow you to discover the issues that could be fueling the discord between you and your partner.
Moreover, you have to decide if your relationship is worth saving at all. Remember we said a break could precede a breakup? You can decide to end your relationship if the problems are beyond solving.
Create an Action Plan
If you decided against ending your relationship during the break, it’s time to take action. This means doing something that’ll improve your relationship and make it better compared to its pre-break period. Usually, you won’t be able to take action if you don’t reflect on your relationship, so this is a must.
Your post-break action(s) should be geared towards solving the problem that made a break necessary in the first instance. It could be that communication between you and your partner was poor before the relationship breaks. Or, maybe some personal insecurities are creating negative emotions and affecting your interactions.
Whatever the problem, make sure that you take action to solve it.
If it’s a problem that requires cooperation, both of you might have to visit a therapist or an expert that can help. Usually, professionals like that can serve as mediators between couples and settle the conflict.
Do Relationship Breaks Work?
As we said before, a break could be a precursor to a permanent breakup. This is often when one party already wanted a breakup before and used the break as a way out. Don’t use a break to prepare for a breakup. If you want to end the relationship, then do so immediately without dragging it.
However, when used effectively, a relationship break can force you to reassess your relationship and see what’s wrong with it. In fact, many couples that are waxing strong today have gone on a break before. If your relationship is meant to be, it’ll survive the break, and the love will grow stronger. Que sera sera.
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